Monday, January 25, 2010

Blog Material

I must say, I need to go to the gym everyday because it is full of the most perfect blog material. When I met with the trainer (almost 2 weeks ago) she told me not to worry about looking stupid in front of other people in the gym because no one is paying any attention to anyone else because everyone is concentrating on their own work out. This, I know, is a crock because I, for one, am there only to be entertained by the people around me. I also do not practice proper gym etiquette because I am all up in other people's business. Beware! If you are on the treadmill next to me, I have scouted out your mph, incline, minutes on and how far you've already gone and what music you are listening to one your ipod. Yep, I'm that Nosy Butinski.

Today, I enjoyed watching some college age guy doing some of the craziest moves I have ever witnessed. God knows I can't even begin to image what this technique would be called, but he was on some kind of apparatus, and then bending over from side to side over some cushioned piece with one arm over his head. I stared. Why would someone do that? I sure as heck have no earthly idea.

Then there were the two teenage girls that flanked me on the treadmill. They were each running about 5.8mph and were flipping through some US Weekly magazines. How do you read when you are bouncing up and down? This is beyond me.

I love that the treadmill area is right next to the weight benches. Men make very funny noises when they are lifting heavy objects.

And I must admit, I am also goofy looking at the gym. I listen to my ipod and walk at a 4.0mph, clocking in my 3 miles. It is all that I can do to not jump my feet out on the rails of the treadmill and break it down. Seriously. Blame it on the Boogie was a groove tune today. I showed the mystical machine riders behind me some serious hip action. I also catch myself singing out loud from time to time. As I am sure that I have mentioned before, I love Dr. Dre (and all things Dre). I also love some old school rap. During two different songs today I caught myself singing out loud....like this...

"Get my drink on. And my smoke on. And go home with...something to poke on" and then later in the same song... "We're gonna rock it till the wheels fall off. Hold up. Heeeeeeeyyyyy."

What???!!! Did I just say those things out loud while bobbin my head??? Ugh.

OR this one...

"I'll serve your a** like John McEnroe. If your girl steps up I'm smackin the ho. Word to your moms I came to drop bombs. I got more rhymes than the bibles got psalms."

So I catch this nonsense coming out of my mouth and then quickly look around to see if anyone noticed. But the girls reading their magazines next to me have their ear buds in and are absorbed in the fashion of the Golden Globes, and college boy with his side crunches is very involved in his bending moves, and the guys lifting weights....they couldn't hear me over their grunting. And then I said a silent prayer of thanks that no one seemed to notice. And that none of my former students were around...because that would be disastrous. But of course, someone could totally be writing about me on their own blog right now....the white girl who couldn't stop spitting out rap lyrics while power walking on the treadmill pretending she was rollin in a 5.0, with her mind on her money and her money on her mind. Sheesh. *shakes head, rolls eyes*

6 comments:

Emily said...

lmao. That is all.

Wayne said...

That is hilarious Ang! I so got a mental picture of you on that treadmill singing and bopping. I could see myself right next to you ridin dirty LOL. That's why I stay away from the gym!

Untitled Flow said...

Lol I'll be on a look out next time I hit the gym

KBBean said...

Man, I can so picture you jamming OUT to all your old-school rap. It is GREAT. I'm loving reading your blog--keep it coming!

Cleo said...

At this VERY SECOND, I'm sending you one of my favorite old school rap songs for gym inspiration. Rock on, sister.

crystal b. said...

Oh my gosh.... I'm so glad to know that someone else does this too!!!! Great post!